The Monsoon Season Read online

THE MONSOON SEASON

  by Nobo13

  Copyright 2011 Nobo13

  *****

  Smashwaords Edition License Notes

  The Monsoon Season

  By Nobo13

  White lies

  White lies

  Shining bright as any star in the night sky

  As I gaze on through your smile

  Star crossed lovers

  Walking away from each other for the last time

  As echoes of a love that had been ripple on

  I've said so many things

  That even I cannot tell you the whole truth of it

  As I dye my words a darker shade of grey

  And as morning arrives

  I see the harsh reality of it all unfolding before me

  That my love was nothing more than a phantom

  Like a shadow

  Hiding foolishly behind this tiny heart of mine

  Telling me nothing but sweet little white lies

  Teardrop

  Within a teardrop

  I learnt the burden of love

  So heavy but small

  Death poem

  Bury my body

  Not your memories of me

  There I’m still alive

  Dull skies

  Among the hustle

  I came to realise silence

  ~ Wonderful days lost

  Somebody please…

  Somebody please show me the light

  I have been in the dark so long I sold my eyes

  Somebody please give me some might

  I have been alone so long I made my heart's demise

  Somebody please shout out my name

  I have been in silence so long I ripped off my ears

  Somebody please take away my shame

  I have been left in the dark for years and years

  Somebody please tell me my name

  I have been isolated so long I have forgotten

  Somebody please return my flame

  I have been crying so long I have become rotten

  Somebody please give me some love

  I’ve been hating for so long I cannot remember

  Somebody please find me someone to love

  I have been cold for so long my love is but an ember

  Somebody please, somebody please

  Can you hear my voice?

  Somebody please, give me some ease

  So that I may rejoice

  Stubborn stains

  This morning I walked into my heart to empty my wardrobe

  Of all my wasted dreams that had gathered dust

  And among all those clothes were stubborn stains

  That reminded me immediately of you

  Among a myriad of stars those stains would strobe

  A nostalgic light that followed a warm gust

  That easily awoke my memories bond by heavy chains

  Taking me back to the time of just us two

  You kept me going, kept me straying from the light

  You'd hold my hand in the most tragic of times

  And breathe softly words that had no weight but moved me

  You were my happiness, my world, my light and day

  But elsewhere needed you, it took you away in the night

  Faster than my tears could fall, hitting the ground like chimes

  But somehow you knew our time together wasn't a guarantee

  And you left these stains, knowing they would stay

  Again, you've gone beyond and reminded me of common happiness

  With simply a red stain, you've held my hand tighter than ever

  I've dusted my dreams off, and place them back inside

  That is where they belong, with you always by their side

  Wherever you are,

  As you stare at the stars

  Has my words reached you?

  You're gone but your stains remain,

  Softly I say to them

  "Thank you,

  I love you"

  How much can I sow?

  Take my life and lay it in front of you

  Take each little piece and stare

  Each memory a shade of blue

  With no one in sight to care

  And as you stare, you will see

  That it continues on, seemingly endless

  These pieces of blue that are to be

  I wish to stop and be moving less

  All I ever wanted was an end

  To know how far I could go

  All I ever wanted to know my friend

  Is how much I could sow?

  Echoes

  As I wander round

  I see echoes, not people,

  Of someone I knew

  A smile ripples

  Long forgotten memories

  Of someone I loved

  Day and night repeat

  As I try to remember

  Someone I forgot

  Echoes ripple on

  As I cry not knowing why

  There isn't ‘someone...’

  That someone I loved

  That someone I forgotten

  That someone is gone...

  Forever an echo to me... echoing on.

  You have the last laugh

  You would be the beautiful night sky

  If your tears were twinkling stars

  But each drop is filled with bluest sadness

  That makes me feel contempt at fate

  For I know no one else who shoulders more

  Than your share of life's fondest miseries

  Only the irony of you always smiling

  Stabs my heart more than any real knife could

  Yet nothing torments my soul more

  Than these useless hands of mine

  That can never reach you, no matter what

  Yet, brittle as they are, I reach out

  Your tears rusting these harsh feelings

  Allowing a smile to crack through

  A simper made and meant for you

  Look how far I got without you

  Look how far I got without you

  See how I walked away from you that day

  I've seen turtles dance, done even more

  Than you ever said I could do

  I'm such an amazing person now

  Yet...

  All I do is look back to the past

  Turning around to see that day

  I'm always comparing everything

  To when I left, saying how far I am

  But all I ever wanted was

  For you to be close to me

  Look how far I got without you

  Look how sad I am

  Look how much farther I could go with you

  If only I didn't get this distant from you

  My hands can't reach that far

  Holding nothing but the moonlight

  As I wander further into the dark

  Always telling myself

  "Look how far I got without you"

  Goodbye my Gardener

  Without knowing it

  I became a gardener

  Sowing little seeds

  There exist something

  So beautiful in this world

  That it breaks your heart

  Inside everyone

  Is a flower called 'Goodbye'

  Waiting to blossom

  Without knowing it

  I had watered your flower

  With all my feelings

  Until it matured

  Into tear coloured petals

  Simply called "Farewell"

  And that's when I knew

  You had been my gardener

  Taking care of me

  Watering my seeds

  With all your feelings of love

  Into f
inally…

  “…Goodbye”

  These tiny pieces of mine

  Just sitting down to think aloud

  Of memories that make me sad and proud

  Of people, where are they now, what are they doing?

  And last of me, where am I going?

  These tiny pieces of mine

  My hand is shaking

  I'm sad, but I'll be fine

  Together, this future we're making

  Tiny things stir my heart around

  Makes my heart beat a thundering sound

  Of all of my tiny pieces, that shine

  Yours is the one that makes me divine

  These tiny pieces of mine

  Look how they laugh and cry

  Everything is ok, it is in line

  Though I may stop right now and die

  And when we are old and crooked

  So many pieces lost and hooked

  It means all the more for our minds

  Our whispers lost on the winds

  These tiny pieces of mine

  They are bigger than me after all

  Everything is dark, I don't think I'm fine

  And now my tiny pieces fall

  Friends, family, pets, and sacred secret things

  That shines, beeps, sings, and swings

  All that that which makes me happiest

  These tiny pieces of mine are the best

  These tiny pieces of mine

  They are long lost and forgotten

  These tiny pieces of mine

  My heart without them, becomes rotten

  These tiny pieces of mine…

  These tiny pieces of mine…

  No one to kiss me goodnight

  Dressed in an armour

  To hide myself among wolves

  I leave my Mother's hand

  And venture forward without looking back

  Any tears that flow

  I store in my heart for later

  What pains that may come

  I treasure them within a crooked smile

  And soon I am home

  Safe and sound while night drops

  Mother kisses me goodnight

  And I drift away one more time for today

  But soon the armour is irreplaceable

  I never take it off

  Those wolves' words leave my mouth

  Shouting and growling!

  I bite my mother's hand

  A tiny drop

  Leaves

  Her eyes as she submits before me

  Blind with

  Power I carry on without her

  What a fool I have become

  A little lamb roaring into the night

  On and on...

  Away and lost...

  And soon the armour breaks

  Leaving me naked, alone

  With tears I saved up

  And pains behind a fake smile

  And no one is left

  To kiss goodnight

  This scared little lamb

  Pretending to be a wolf...

  Her reply

  We stood together one last time

  At the station waiting for the train

  The cold air showed me your breath

  As I stood closer than usual

  This would the last time we will meet

  The last ever chance

  In a foolish instant and turned to you

  And told you how I felt

  In the time it took

  To say those three words

  Your train came speeding past

  Blowing steam as it stopped

  I stood there in despair

  As I watched my words

  Like a paper airplane

  Drop to the cold ground

  My words never to reach you

  They were lost forever

  I could never tell you

  How I truly loved you

  You rushed to check your things

  You hopped on board

  As you asked if I said anything

  I sigh with a smile

  And said "Nothing at all"

  I stare as the doors close

  The bell signals departure

  I smile weakly as she waves goodbye

  And in the glow of the train light

  I heard her reply

  White out

  A tiny shape

  That was a town

  Can be seen here

  Hidden under

  A thick snow fall

  That left everything

  Bare

  Fond memories

  Are also there...

  Under another kind of snow

  One that has settled

  In a long Winter

  Deep inside of me

  A barren land

  Still and silent

  Stirring no one's

  Heart

  Lost under snow

  I rove about

  Not sure of what I may have lost

  Not sure If I knew the way back

  In this white out

  Condensation on my memories

  A white sky greets me as I stir awake

  From a dream or a memory that's fake

  Cold from the sudden loss of my cover

  A wet dew slowly condenses over

  My memories of you, those happy times

  Those thoughts hover over me and my crimes

  Barely forgotten but blurry for good

  I try to remember all that I could

  ~ My feelings for you haven't changed a bit

  ~ It's this thick dew that stops it to transmit

  No me, no you

  I met someone who said death was his second fear

  I asked what was the first and he replied ‘life’

  I asked why he was crying and to me he replied

  "So I don't forget the important things to me"

  He seemed in pain so I asked why carry on living?

  He replied, "It's all I have" with a trembling voice

  His eyes were dark with sorrow so I asked why he was sad

  He simply shook his head and replied I would understand one day

  I didn't, and I hope I will someday, I said goodbye

  Goodbye to the person in the mirror

  Because you know best

  Had you said goodbye

  Along with I love you then

  I might have moved on

  Had I not loved you

  I could have forgotten you

  I wouldn't be sad

  Because you're gone now

  Without saying a goodbye

  Without an ending

  I carry on cold

  Not loving anyone else

  Only loving you

  Living in the past

  Not wanting to forget you

  But still trying to

  Because you know best

  I trusted you with my heart

  Knowing it was safe

  Because you know best

  I believed you wouldn't die

  How silly of me

  I'm waiting for you

  You who is longer here

  Waiting to move on

  Because you know best…

  I keep telling myself this

  Believing it still

  Today, tomorrow and yesterday

  Today will change your life

  But Tomorrow doesn't want you to know

  Yesterday is your wisdom

  But Today will make you a fool

  Tomorrow has your dreams

  But Today always tries to steal them

  We continue on

  Wanting to be more than Yesterday

  When we have regrets

  We want Yesterday to be Tomorrow

  When we are sad

  We want Tomorrow not to come

  But above all else

  We want Today to go as we want

  I had lost it in a single tear

  I had loved someone

  So long
ago

  Loving them one-sidedly

  Until my feelings broke

  In a single tear

  I had lost it all

  All of my love fitted

  Along with some salt

  Inside a single drop

  That continues to fall

  Till this very day

  Six feet from heaven

  And I got on the elevator,

  Only to have my heart stolen,

  She pressed the 20th floor,

  So I pressed the one above,

  The hum of motors

  Making our potential stronger

  Was a choir of cupids to me,

  As I stared through the corner of my eye,

  To that angel returning home

  I felt harmony for the first time

  And at six feet from heaven I realised

  How I loved her so dearly

  To love someone so passionately

  And not have a place in their hearts

  It is like saying you're hungry

  To a keeled over starving child

  I see love grant the wishes of everyone else

  Yet give me only bitterness and hate

  I'm tired of being alone

  Petrified of when the elevator will stop

  But it comes so normally

  As I watch her leave

  Not even giving me a thought

  She never showed me her face

  Never showed me her smile

  And in the end

  I descend down to purgatory

  Six feet from heaven

  Is the most I could manage

  Was the most my love could climb

  And in the end

  I didn't need your name

  Because you won't call for me

  Because you won't answer my call

  So I smile on my elevator

  My tears fall back down to earth

  Taking my love with it

  Hope

  I've been walking on the straight path,

  But the ground fell before someone's wrath,